Guilt of the 1st degree

I bought the child corral. 

I love the child corral.

My son, however, does not share the same feelings that I do for the playpen.  He tolerated his colorful prison for awhile at first.  He sat inside its parameters and played with the toys I supplied him.  He drank his sippy cups when I placed them in his little hands.  He smiled and laughed as the world continued around him. 

But as the days turned into a week, his tolerance slowly faded.  Maximus's cheerful smiles turned into cries of anger and resentment.  He literally was angry with me!  He rejected my embrace; he turned away from me and preferred Blake's hugs over my snuggles. 

I felt heartbroken.  I tried to explain my actions to Maximus: "Honey, I only put you in the corral when I have to!  I can't have you climbing the dining room table or pulling knives out of the dishwasher.  I will let you roam free as often as I can." 

It didn't matter to my son.  He refused to acknowledge my explanations!  Every time I carried him anywhere near the playpen, he started to cry.  My feelings of guilt increased with his every wail.  I began to second-guess my genius purchase.  I let my son freely roam the house again.  Trails of destruction piled up in his wake.

This is where parents struggle.  Do we do what is right for the child, even though he does not understand what is best for him, or do we allow our guilt to weigh in the child's favor? 

I am still wishy-washy on the issue.  I continue to use the playpen, but I only use it for short periods of time.  My thoughts are consumed with hopes that Maximus will outgrow his over-curious behavior soon, and the playpen can be put away until we buy a puppy.

Good God, a puppy?